Let Your Walls Fall Down

Dr. James Mellon

Talk Only Video

TRANSCRIPT

So, how I want to start today's conversation with you is this quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, "The only person you are destined to become, is the person you decide to be." 

Makes sense, doesn't it? The question is, have you decided to be who you've become, or have you just become what life has made you?  For many people we become what life has made us. We've become the relationships we've had, the jobs we've had, the successes, the failures we've had. And we become that person, the person that has experienced all of this. But at any moment, in the flash of an inspiration, you can decide to move all that aside, and be who you want to be. Turn into the very creative, amazing, expansive mind that you are, that you absolutely are. 

So today, I really do want you to think about what's going on in your mind, in your life that has brought you to this moment in time. That has brought you to be this person at this time. So the title of my talk today is, "Let Your Walls Fall Down." 

Now, last night, when I said, the title of my talk, because whenever I'm out to dinner on a Saturday night, and Marcy Welland's around, she asked me the title of my talk the next day, which first presumes that I know it. And then I have to figure out what is it that I'm saying tomorrow? And I said that your walls fall down. And she said, well, that assumes that we have walls. Because she just is like that. And I thought about that. And it is, I do assume that you all have some walls that you have. That song, "Open a new window," you know, "open a new door." It's all about, I live in a house, and I want to give myself some room, try something new, a new highway, because I've been on this highway. Every single one of those are types of walls we have. Every time we identify ourselves as something, we are recognizing a type of a wall. Unless you're recognizing yourself as what? God! Now there are no walls, everything's gone, you're letting all your walls down. So that's the oversoul view of this. 

The individual view of this is for you to decide what walls do you live behind? What type of ideas do you kind of stand behind? Where in your life are you making choices and decisions based on all of that, and not taking the moment to inspire yourself into knowing everything's possible, every choice is possible. Every decision you make can be made from that mindset, the mindset that knows who and what he or she is. 

So, open a new window, open a new door, open a new highway, and I love this line, "Before you're a dull fellow." How many dull fellows are in here today? Barry, you are so not dull. I don't think you have a dull color in your closet. Right? But here's the thing, you know what it means to be a dull fellow? Not that you're boring, necessarily. You can be incredibly entertaining and still be adult fellow. Because you're still being entertaining, doing the same shtick you've been doing your whole life. There can be some really exciting, fun, amazing people who are still living the same shtick they're living that they've been living. So how many people here, by a show of hands, how many of you think you do have a certain shtick that you live sometimes? And the rest of you...won't admit it exactly. 

No, but there is. There's this-- I have a shtick. I do and I know it. And sometimes I use it and sometimes I don't. And sometimes when I don't use it people-- This is what happens to me when I'm not my gregarious, happy, cheerful self, which I heard Dr. Laura last week when she was here. She said it's very hard to get me to be angry, right? Yeah, she's not-- She's lying. She was just being nice to me. No, she's not lying. Dr. Laura does not lie since she ended by calling you all bitches. You can only imagine me in Studio City watching the replay of that. I was like "Ahh!" Well, next week we will have thinned out a bit. Okay, so. We know what it stands for. What it means to all your new people that are showing up today. What is it? A Being Inspired To Change Humanity. A being inspired to change humanity. I don't know that that lessens the effect of it, when you know what it means.

But anyway, back to our shtick. When I don't show up as that, people inevitably think something's wrong with me. They're like, are you okay? Are you okay? I'm like, I'm good, why? "You just, you seem off." I'm like, Well, I'm not doing cartwheels. But I'm really okay. So we really need to take a look at this and see, where are our walls? Where are our facades? Where are we creating these reactions even to things? Show of hands: How many people have said they liked something when they didn't? Because that's the natural thing to say? "What do you think of this dress?" "Beautiful." 

I had an experience once. Very dear friend of mine who's no longer my friend, came-- Seriously. I think it started that night-- came to this dinner party. And she was wearing this god awful green dress that was just all wrong in every way. According to me. She felt great in it. So I had just taught a class about, try to be honest, try to be honest, and try to be honest in a respectful, loving way. Apparently, I missed the second and third part of that. And so she said, What do you think this dress? I said, it is really not you. And she went, "You serious? I think it looks beautiful." And then I even got worse. By the way. This was like 15 years ago. I've changed. I now lie like the rest of you. Just don't ask me what you look like. But I did. Yeah, don't ever ask me again. "How's this look?" I'm blushing. Sometimes I get up here. And I'm like, do you really need to tell them everything you're thinking? Well, yes, exactly. 

Anyway, I did tell her the rest of my story. And then I finally realized I was wrong. I was really wrong. I should have just said, Do you like it? That's all that matters. Which is same thing as telling them you don't like it? Right. Isn't that the subtext? What do you think of this dress? Do you like wearing it? Because that's all that matters. So and I do love that dress. You know that? (responding to someone in audience.) Yeah, exactly. Do you really like that? Did you mean to put that on tonight? Yeah. Anyway, back to your shtick. See, this is my shtick, I get caught in my telling the truth. 

So when I'm talking about let your walls fall down, I'm talking about finding that place in yourself where you can let go of everything and start over. You know, that's what that song is about. Open a new window, open a new door, travel a new highway that's never been traveled before. It's not that but something like that. Right? So being willing to just knock it all down. And also being willing to not show up for people the way they expect you to show up. 

Any of you here who are a little bit of people pleaser type, we tend to show up sometimes the way people want us to show up. And is that being my authentic self? And why can't I be moody if I'm in a mood? Respectfully and lovingly. I can be and so can you. Is that your authentic self? It is in that moment. But it's only that way because you've actually talked yourself into it. Somehow you've allowed your beliefs to get you there. But I'll get back to that. 

So before you're a dull fellow, dance to a new rhythm, and whistle a new song. And then this slide. "The person you ought to be is three dimensional." Now, I knew Jerry Herman, and very prolific man. And I don't even think he understood the quantum relationship to this. I'm sure he didn't. Who you are, is not who you show up as in life. Just to be clear, who you show up in life is based on everything that has brought you to this moment, as I said earlier. But who you are, is so much bigger than any of that. And when we come from a perspective of knowing and realizing that who I am is bigger than any of how I show up in this world. things just shift. 

When you walk around from the perspective of knowing who you are, (I'm thinking the signs up there... remember who you are.) If you walk around from that perspective, life shifts, life changes, because you stop reacting to the minutiae of life, and to all the really irrelevant things that sometimes we grab on to, and think that's really the truth. 

So, the quantum logic is, there are no walls, there is just a pure field of quantum energy. That's what you are. A pure infinite field of creativity, intelligence, wisdom, intuitive-knowing. All of that is available, accessible, it's who you are, it's what you are. But we put up the walls: "No, I'm a human." 

Recently, someone said I'm a human being having a spiritual experience, or I'm a spiritual being having a human experience. And I'm like, can we get rid of both of those sentences? I am not dualistic. I am a spiritual human being. One thing. I am divine, I am human, and they are one and the same thing. And Ernest Holmes, by the way, at the end of his life, taught that. He said, let's stop separating God and man, let's start realizing I am God, no matter how I show up. Sometimes I'm God having a bad day. Sometimes I'm God, and I'm angry. Sometimes I'm God, and I'm extravagantly fulfilled in life. So one thing. 

So the person you ought to be is three dimensional. We have so much more that we've not even begun to tap into, as divine human beings. And we get trapped behind these walls of attaching ourselves to perceptions of who we think we are. So when you hear that, who do you think you are? Even though it sounds like who do you think you are? But it's a good question to answer. Who do you think you are? Do you think you're this person who's in this marriage? Or who had two divorces, and therefore you failed twice? You know, my feeling about that. It means you had two relationships, and they ran their course. And you've moved on, both of you. We've got to stop telling ourselves, we're this because of this. No, I'm this because of this. And if we're willing to come from that perspective, I'm telling you, life really does change.

This next quote, "Don't be pushed around by the fears, in your mind, be led by the dreams in your heart." Isn't that beautiful? Your fears are the walls I'm talking about. Every fear you have is a wall. That fear shows up, it is so thick, it is such a thick wall, and you're behind it. And there's the wall. So don't be pushed around by the fears, in your mind be led by the dreams in your heart. Fears and walls. Fears are walls between you and your true self. So how do you get by that? How do you get by this idea of, Well, I'm fearful. What am I supposed to just walk through it? Uh huh. That's what you're supposed to do. And I know, I've told the story 1000 times, but that one show I did where I was scared to death, to death, standing there waiting for that curtain. While the curtain was up, I was hidden behind the set. That was one of my biggest lessons, not just as an actor, but as a person, as a divine human being, that it didn't matter how much fear I had, I was going to take that walk and start, whatever that journey was. And that's where we have to be, because we're listening to my heart. Because in that moment, I also knew there was a two hour, two hour and 40 minute musical that needed to be played out. And I was the central character. I was the story. So it was like, You know what you may want to run, you would like to disappear right now. And you are like, this costume needs to be cleaned after this show. Because I was sweating from every pore, I was just like, "Ehhhh." And I started to sing, in the wrong key. But I found it eventually. 

So that's what this is being asked of you. Don't be pushed around by your fears. Remember why you're there in the first place, and just walk from that perspective. The fears can follow. They're fine. Fear can be there. Nope, doesn't matter. What's the prevalent thought though? Your heart's desire. That's what has to show up. 

So I have a little exercise for you to do today. I'm going to ask you in a minute to close your eyes and take a deep breath. And then I'm going to ask you a question. And I want you to not judge it. I just want you to observe any thought that comes up from the question. Okay. 

So take a deep breath. Close your eyes. Just sit there for a moment. Clear your mind a bit. Adair, close your eyes. I can see you all. Just breathe naturally. And I'm just going to ask you a question. And when I ask you the question, it's not for you to answer. It's for you to hear, to listen to whatever comes up first. Okay? 

"What do you want to do with the rest of your life?" 

Take another deep breath, let it out. Let go of whatever that thought was. What do you want to do with the rest of your life? Just let it land, let it stay there. Take another deep breath real deep. And let it out. Clear your mind again. And again, I'm just going to ask you to let whatever comes up come up. 

"What's holding you back from doing what you want to do?"

Okay, take a deep breath and open your eyes. So if you did this exercise in a way that you really allowed yourself to hear something, then whatever came up that came up is for yours to look at. Whatever it was. I mean, if suddenly you heard something crazy. Don't don't be so quick to say, well, that's crazy. Because the you that's saying, "Well, that's not really what I really want," is probably the person, the full fellow, who was so used to living this way. 

That is a great exercise. You can do it at any time. If you just stop everything, take a deep breath, get quiet. And then ask yourself a question and listen to see what comes up. So did anybody have-- I'm not going to ask you to share it. But did anybody have something surprising come up? Yeah, okay. 

I did it just yesterday as I was preparing this, and something did come up, surprising. And I was like... hmm. And I did my dull fellow moment, I was like, obviously, I must be-- my mind must be a little crazy. So do it again. And I did it again. It just popped right up again. And I was like, alright, I'll pay attention to that. So I'll be opening a bakery soon. You would love that, Marcy. Yeah. Unfortunately, it's not a bakery. 

So next slide, is the same as the first slide. But with a different picture, the only person you're destined to become is the person you decide to be. So you may have a little bit of information right now that you didn't have earlier, you may have had something pop up that you weren't expecting to pop up. Or the same old, same old popped up. And you may be saying to yourself, I need to do this and get really quiet and then just let whatever comes up comes up, whatever. Or you may be in the perfect life that you are destined to be living, because that's what you've decided. 

But I'm here today to tell you, in this month of inspiration, that you are the only person that can decide what life is yours to live. And I do not believe any of us are at the point where there isn't something new and exciting that could show up in our lives. And that's why I love that Nancy Soren at 85 years old is singing "Open a New Window." She's not staying retired to a golf course. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Probably half of you live on golf-- who lives in golf courses? Thank you goodbye. (laughter) But there's more than the golf course. Right? Some of you were like, no. I love my golf course. If I were my own teacher, I'd be saying read the room. 

So my question to you is, what are you willing to decide? That's what it really comes down to. What are you willing to decide? Do you have dull fellow habits that you'd like to get rid of? That's one thing I will tell you that C.P.R. has done for me. Amazingly, this time. It's giving me the opportunity to look at some of the habits that I have that I don't want. And I made a commitment that there's one habit I just don't like and so I was like, nope, for these 30 days, I'm just going to exercise it and then you know, I failed twice. And I was like wow. Okay, so Do I want it? Or don't I want it? And I had to get really clear on it. And the answer is no. But I have to decide, I have to absolutely decide, this is what I want. And it's about stepping away from the fear, finding out what my heart wants, and lead from my heart and travel a new highway that no one's ever traveled before. I don't need to be like anybody else. And I've spent my life teaching and inspiring people, I hope to-- I don't hope I know, inspiring people to not worry about what other people think they should be or who they should be. We get to decide, this is what I do. This is what makes my heart sing. And if it doesn't make your heart sing, there are a billion other people on the planet to go have your heart sung by. Right? 

So my question to you today is, what are you willing to decide today? My last quote is by Tony Robbins, "People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals. That is goals that do not inspire them."

I tossed and turned over whether I wanted to use the word impotent in my talk, but you know what, because it hit me in such a visceral way, I was like, it's true. Some of us have goals that we've lost, they've just lost their energy. Some of us are still living dreams that we don't even dream anymore. Some of us are still willing to live in lives that have long since served their purpose. And it's same old, same old, and we are that dull fellow that Nancy just sang about. 

So here's your wake up call to any of you or all of you, myself included. it's time. It's time for us to make a decision. Doesn't matter what age we're at. Don told me yesterday at a party that he drove to Pasadena to go see "Ann" because he wanted to go see it at 94. And why shouldn't he at 104? Get in a car and drive where you want to go. But people tend to think because you're a certain age, you need help. You don't need help, you need your mind to work perfectly. That's it. Because when your mind works perfectly, your body follows. And when your mind works perfectly, your bank account follows. And when your mind works perfectly, your relationships are in order, and so is your creative excitement. So it may just be that your goals don't inspire you anymore. 

So what are you willing to decide, as we end this month of inspiration, of Inspire? What are you willing to decide about yourself that just might turn your life around, and it might make you uncomfortable for a moment, but that's okay. If you're willing to let your walls fall away, you will be able to know what inspires you. 

Those walls sometimes are blocking out the inspiration. So let them go. Let your fears go. Get your "yeah butts" go. Let all the things that you used to be go. Let your own idea of who you are, go. Go back to, "I know nothing. Now what can I know?" because you are the inspiration of life living itself as you through you. And if you just let your walls fall down, that inspiration's going to have the energy it needs. It's going to have the ignition it needs. It is going to light a spark in you and you are going to not only no longer be a dull fellow, you are going to be the most expansive, exciting person that you've ever met in your life. And when that happens, then we know exactly who we are. And we get to live from that perspective. Namaste.